What’s possible for the tango community if we separate gender and tango dancing roles?
One of the things I love about Argentine tango is how masculine and feminine energies work together in conversation. Strength and softness. Direct intention and creative expression. Boldness and beauty. Structure and letting go.
Although historically, leading and following roles in tango are strongly associated with gender roles, this harmonious experience does not have to be between a man and a woman.
Of course! Same sex partners dance together all the time — that’s nothing new.
Yet, when you type “tango” into Google, all the top hits show the traditional masculine and feminine balance — man leading, woman following.
This traditional image of tango is a product of history and culture. It’s beautiful and entertaining. It shows men playing the masculine and women playing the feminine.Yet tango has so much more to offer us.
Tango teacher, DJ, and organizer, Melina Sedo, recently wrote a post calling for us to “uncouple dance role and gender in tango.” She says it well, and I hope this post adds to the bold vision she sets forth.
Because if we seriously pursue a tango unattached to gender, we can become more dynamic dancers, more powerful humans, and create an even more fulfilling community experience.
Here’s how —
1. Personally, we can understand and embody the characteristics we want to cultivate in ourselves by dancing both roles. As we take the time to learn to both lead and follow, we understand the dance so much better, and we take the skills of empowered leadership and followership into our lives. Similarly, as we explore both feminine and masculine qualities within ourselves, we gain the power to more skillfully choose how we show up on the dance floor, and in the world.
In my own tango journey, I’ve been a follower since I began studying tango about six years ago. When I started dancing I didn’t even consider learning the lead role as a woman. Maybe because the follower role happens to align with my natural personality. I’m a good listener, naturally curious, and agreeable. I enjoy being spontaneous, and I’m great at going with the flow. I really enjoy letting go and being led.
On the flip side, I’m uncomfortable with being bold, direct, and decisive. And navigation isn’t my strong suit.
As I train myself as a leader, the physical practice of embodying these traits helps me to understand and model new ways of being in my life. As a life coach, I’m obsessed with this self-study and personal development, and I see tango as an avenue for growth.
If you’re interested in bringing the traits of empowered leadership and followership into your life, read Sharna Fabiano’s blog. She’s a coach and tango dancer who has been a big inspiration in my life.
2. Practically, we can re-calibrate the Yin-Yang balance of the tango world that’s been disrupted. Because generally, more women than men want to dance. That means that in many communities around the world, there are more followers than leaders. This imbalance creates frustration for followers who must sit and wait, or work hard for dances. And leaders who feel pressure to dance without stopping to please hungry followers. At festivals and events that require registration to ensure role balance, lots of single followers can’t get in. No fun.
For a clear and experienced perspective on this phenomenon, read Melina Sedo’s “Long due post on gender roles in tango.”
As we encourage more women to lead from the beginning of the tango journey, and normalize the role of the leading woman, we’ll find our collective axis as a community. And we’ll continue to evolve tango as an art form and language.
3. Socially, we can create an even more respectful, open, and welcoming experience for all dancers. Gender and sexual equality movements all over the world demand that we shake off old stereotypes and embrace each other with all our differences. Tango dancers are great at embracing each other! It’s a no-brainer for us to continue to treat each other with openness and respect, no matter our gender, race, way of dress, or choice of role.
If we blindly subscribe to traditional gender roles, we limit ourselves as dancers and as humans. Why should our gender automatically define the toys we play with as children, the subjects we study at school, the jobs we get, or the roles we dance?
The natural evolution of the dance and the community isn’t a threat to the traditional way — it’s an expansion. Both exist together. I hope in years to come that we can add to the traditional image of tango. That the 1-second Google search for “Tango” reflects the depth of the art form and the diversity of the community.
My next question is this: how can we continue to let gender stereotypes go, while also claiming our feminine or masculine power? I’m excited to explore this question in my next post. Stay tuned!
